If you’re feeling alone, sad, overwhelmed, or isolated, you are not alone. As cases of the COVID-19 pandemic continue to rise in the U.S., combined with the arrival of the flu season during the upcoming winter months, it is possible for increased physical and social isolation, and more stringent lockdown measures to take place. With this, there might be an uprise in isolating behaviors among people.
Humans are social creatures, and many of us find comfort in staying connected. When we are deprived of these deep social connections, we have a tendency to feel lonely or isolated. The longer this isolation and loneliness last, the higher our risk is for mental, emotional, and physical problems. Typically, loneliness is a signal to a depressive episode and is seen as an individual problem treated with things like exposure therapy. Now, isolation is a lot more nuanced. Because we are social distancing due to a global pandemic, “treating” loneliness and isolation behaviors takes a little more creativity.
Isolation makes you think that you are the only one, and you’re the only one who’s feeling alone and that’s not true. This is NOT a normal situation, and you’re already handling it – however that looks like for you. As this pandemic continues, we want to give you a few tools for coping with these hard feelings, because you really are not alone in this.
qUESTIONS TO ASK YOURSELF:
When is the last time I’ve been outside?
How am I talking to myself?
What tone of voice do I use?
How am I feeling today, really?
What’s taking up most of my headspace right now?
When is the last time I ate or drank anything?
How has my sleeping been?
What are 3 things I’m grateful for?
When is the last time I reached out to, or checked in on someone I care about?
How do I feel about myself and my life?
Tips for coping with loneliness:
List what is and is not in your control.
When we shift our focus to what we can control, we are more likely to see differences in all aspects of our health and performance. As a practice, draw one circle with space outside of it. Inside the circle, write down what you have control over, outside of the circle, write down what you do not have control over. Having a visual idea of what is, and what is not yours to carry can help put things into perspective and release some of those overwhelming thoughts and feelings.
Stay connected.
Instead of recommending things like joining in-person groups, invite a friend out to coffee, or going to a museum or the movie theater as steps to combat loneliness, treatment looks pretty different now. The good news is, people have found creative ways to stay connected. Here are a few ideas:
Stay connected with your support system. Resources like Skype, Zoom and Face Time have been major players in people staying connected with their loved ones and social communities. Another way to stay in touch is through my new favorite app, Marco Polo. This app is great for staying connected when it’s convenient for both people. Use photos, voice audio, or video to send and respond back when you can. This can also take away some of the anxiety that live interactions can have, especially on those of us who experience social anxiety.
Online groups. While it may feel more challenging to connect with others, there are still ways to connect with people who have similar interests and stay safe. From virtual volunteering, to book clubs and spaces to simply share some good news, there is a virtual community for everyone.
Go for a walk.
Spending time outside is so important to maintaining our overall health. Make it a routine to walk around your neighborhood or your local park or trail at least once a day. Along with getting fresh air, seeing other people and life coexisting together can remind you that you are not alone, and that we’re all just trying to cope.
Reach out for help.
It’s a perfect time to your counseling journey! More therapists than ever are offering online therapy. Along with this, many of them are offering sliding-scale or reduced payment. Check with your insurance company, or use Psychology Today to see what counselor is right for you.
Start a gratitude practice.
Remind yourself of the good that exists by practicing gratitude. List 5 things you’re grateful for every morning and night, or write a list at the beginning of the week and speak them out loud to yourself every day. It can be easy to fall into a negative self-talk cycle, so start a gratitude practice to stop the cycle before it gets out of control.
Learn to self-soothe.
Although you do not have to go through this alone, it is an important skill to learn how to self-soothe. One way to do this is to meet your basic needs. Stay hydrated, make sure to eat, take a shower, and prioritize your physical comfort. Another way to self-soothe is to speak affirmations or compassionate words to yourself out loud. Think about what you would tell a friend who is struggling in this way. How would you comfort them? Write a list of things you would say and repeat them to yourself when needed. Here are some to start with:
This is really hard, it’s okay to feel like this.
Just because you will be alone this Christmas does not mean you are alone in life.
You are allowed to grieve, you are allowed to mourn.
You are going to be okay.
It’s okay to be sad about this.
Remember, it is okay to grieve the loss of regular comforts and traditions. Change is SO hard! And many of us have yet to accept or have fully adapted to the changes that will likely stay for the long haul. You don’t have to handle this perfectly, but if you’re feeling lonely, know that there is space for you to feel better.
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Stress is a state of mental or emotional strain or tension resulting from adverse or very demanding circumstances. It is the body’s physical response to a real or perceived threat, demand, or danger.
Everyone experiences stress at different levels. Even when the same stressors are present, our experiences can be different. Certain groups experience higher levels of stress, for example, communities of color, LGBTQIA+, women, and parents.
Stress isn’t always harmful. For example, think about the motivation you feel to study for your next exam, or the urge to make a to-do list on a Sunday. These are positive ways that stress can help you focus and complete tasks. But when stress is frequent and intense, it can affect your overall health, resulting in a reduced quality of life.
This is why we want to help you get to the root cause of your stress, understand the ays it manifests for you, and learn preventative tools for coping with stress. Because you deserve a healthy, happy life.
Has a trip to the grocery store ever sent you home in a panic? Was it the fluorescent lights buzzing? The sticky feeling of your sneakers on the floor? Maybe it was the squeaky wheel on your grocery cart or the strong smell of fresh paint? Maybe it was the awkward small talk with an old friend you saw or the interaction you had with the cashier. Or, maybe, it was all of it.
If you’ve ever experienced being overwhelmed like this, you might be a highly sensitive person and you aren’t alone. Nearly 20% of people are highly sensitive and face the same common issues. And while highly sensitive people might experience similar challenges, let me be clear that sensitivity is in no way a character flaw.
Being a highly sensitive person is not a diagnosis, and we discourage the use of it as a negative label for yourself and others. The list we are sharing today is intended to help highly sensitive people feel validated and understand why they may feel a certain way. This list can also be a helpful tool for friends and family of highly sensitive people.
Being sensitive has a negative connotation for a lot of people, especially if they have been accused of or labeled with it in the past. We hope we can help reframe the way people see sensitivity.
In our last blog about ADHD, we discussed what ADHD is, how it typically manifests in women, information on diagnoses, and resources. Today we’re digging in deeper and sharing real, meaningful ways you can combat the symptoms of ADHD. From time management to emotional regulation and sorting paper chaos, these research-based strategies will provide you with straightforward approaches to ease stress and overwhelm so you can live a better, more satisfying life. Before we get started, let us remind you that you don’t need to do all the strategies mentioned to be productive and successful. Find what techniques resonate with you and leave the rest. Honor your humanness. It’s important to be gentle with yourself on your mental health journey.
PRACTICAL TOOLS AND INTERVENTIONS FOR ADHD MENTIONED:
You keep losing your phone, locking your keys in the car, you’re constantly late and feel emotionally overwhelmed. You feel you can never pay attention, you start a lot of projects which you never end up finishing, and you are constantly feeling burnt out. Maybe someone in your life has told you “you might have ADHD” or maybe you’ve been hearing more about the signs and symptoms on Instagram or TikTok and something resonates in you. Whatever the reason, educating yourself is the first step in getting treatment for the symptoms that may be wreaking havoc in your life.
Today we will be talking all about ADHD and women, why it goes unnoticed, common symptoms, if a diagnosis matters, and resources to help you gain control of your life.
July is BIPOC Mental Health Month. We recognize the many layers of barriers that prevent people of color from receiving the support they need. We believe that all people deserve access to health care, especially in a world where Black, Indigenous, and people of color are systemically discriminated against. In an effort to continue advocating for the Black community and other underrepresented communities, we put together this brief guide on BIPOC Mental Health Month.
Anxiety is a feeling of worry, nervousness, dread, and uneasiness typically about an imminent event or something with an uncertain outcome. Social anxiety is a feeling of worry or nervousness focused mainly on social interactions. To better understand social anxiety, let’s start by learning the main components that anxiety is created and sustained by:
Physiological
Rapid heart rate
Sweaty palms
A lack of appetite
Cognitive
Anxious thoughts
Predictions
Judgments
Behavioral
Avoiding certain people, places, or situations
Difficulty saying “no” and honoring boundaries
Tendency to snap at others with little warning
Most people with anxiety experience all 3 parts together. If your professor emails you and asks to speak after class tomorrow, you might experience your heart drop, and your hands begin to sweat (Physiological). Then you might notice yourself starting to worry, and creating scenarios about what they will tell you (Cognitive). Then you might put it off by skipping your next class and finally struggling to make eye contact once you’re there (Behavioral).
When we struggle with anxiety all three components happen almost automatically. That’s why to challenge social anxiety, we must also challenge the three components. The following daily hacks utilize these components.
To witness someone who you care about suffering or struggling can be difficult. It can feel heartbreaking to know that that person could benefit from professional help and yet not see them take that step. Approaching a loved one with the, “Hey, I think you need to talk to someone.” can be a challenging task, but one that we think we can help you navigate.
While it’s not always obvious, sometimes we can be our own worst enemy. We do things like procrastinate, push people away, drink excessively, set unrealistic goals, and break our own boundaries. We don’t do these things because we’re broken or crazy, and we don’t do them because we lack willpower or discipline. Self-sabotage isn’t about being lazy, it’s about you doing your best to cope. Sabotaging yourself, or being in control of certain areas in your life might give you a false sense of control. This might feel safer rather than allowing yourself to be vulnerable to being hurt by something or someone. Give yourself some compassion for trying to cope, and survive, however that has looked like. And remember, who you are and who you have been is not who you will always be. You are always allowed to start new and change old patterns and we’re here to help along the way.
Like any journey, the journey to mental health and wellness might include detours, starts and stops, long pauses, and unexpected factors at play. Choosing to return to therapy is BIG and your dedication to your mental health doesn’t go unnoticed. Whether you haven’t spoken to your therapist in months and are feeling anxious about making the call, you’ve “finished” therapy and are considering returning, or you ghosted your therapist and feel awkward about reaching out again, this is for you. Here are 5 tips for going BACK to therapy.
Being a parent is much more than just providing clothing, a roof over your head, and food on the table. For children to develop into healthy adults, they need to feel safe and supported to grow, be known, and express themselves.
Most emotionally immature parents have no awareness of how they’ve affected their children. To be clear, we aren’t placing blame on these parents, we are seeking to understand why they are the way they are. The goal here is to help you gain new insights about your parent(s) in order to increase your own self-awareness and emotional freedom.
Nov 17, 2021
Nov 17, 2021
Stress is a state of mental or emotional strain or tension resulting from adverse or very demanding circumstances. It is the body’s physical response to a real or perceived threat, demand, or danger.
Everyone experiences stress at different levels. Even when the same stressors are present, our experiences can be different. Certain groups experience higher levels of stress, for example, communities of color, LGBTQIA+, women, and parents.
Stress isn’t always harmful. For example, think about the motivation you feel to study for your next exam, or the urge to make a to-do list on a Sunday. These are positive ways that stress can help you focus and complete tasks. But when stress is frequent and intense, it can affect your overall health, resulting in a reduced quality of life.
This is why we want to help you get to the root cause of your stress, understand the ays it manifests for you, and learn preventative tools for coping with stress. Because you deserve a healthy, happy life.
Nov 17, 2021